The Pain of Seeing Death Treated Like the Easy Answer
Since August 3rd, my life has been flipped upside down. This whole situation has drained me in ways I can’t even explain. Losing Bane still doesn’t sit right with me. The euthanasia was presented to us as the only viable option, but I still don’t believe it was a medical necessity. My mom was already heartbroken, and I think her grief is what pushed the decision forward. Looking back, it didn’t feel like the only option — it felt like we were just steered there because of the emotions and circumstances in the moment.
The pain of losing Bane stays with me every single day. Carrying that weight is exhausting, and I keep asking myself why death always seems to be treated like the default answer.
And then came the murder of Charlie Kirk. It hit me with that same sick feeling in my stomach. It’s not about whether you agreed with him or not. It’s about the fact that somebody decided killing him was the “answer.” And what’s made it even heavier is how people reacted afterward. I’ve always tried to see the good in people. I’ve always wanted to believe that, deep down, most people aren’t evil at their core — that there’s at least some good in everyone if you look for it. But the way some people responded to his death has made me question that belief. People showed their true colors. Celebrating it. Justifying it. Brushing it off like his life didn’t matter because they didn’t agree with him. That kind of disappointment cuts almost as deep as the violence itself.
And the hardest part? The emotional and mental exhaustion of trying to wrap my head around how some people can so quickly jump to death as the answer. It’s draining to even sit with that thought. When people can justify the death of an animal because it seems “easier,” or the death of a person because they don’t agree with them, what does that say about us? What does that mean for the rest of us? It makes me scared for the future of this country, because if disagreement or inconvenience is enough to cheer on death, then where do we even go from here?
It hasn’t changed who I am, but it has made things cross my mind that never used to. I find myself thinking: Do I need to be more careful about what I say? Could somebody twist my words or even try to harm me just because they don’t like my opinion? It’s a messed-up thought to even have, but in today’s world, it feels like you can’t ignore it. Too many people have lost sight of basic humanity, morality, and care for life.
With Bane, I’ll always carry the guilt and sadness of not being able to save him. And with Charlie Kirk, I feel that same heaviness — knowing that death doesn’t solve anything, it just leaves more pain for the people left behind.
Death should never be the first or easiest answer. Whether it’s politics, animals, or personal conflicts — if we keep choosing finality over possibility, nothing will ever change. I’m exhausted, I’m broken, but I’m not done. Because deep down, I still want to believe there’s another way forward.
